Taking off from the ground yesterday, leaving home to go discover unfamiliar lands…my thoughts drifted to Jim dying…is this what it was like? A beautiful ascent into the clouds, as you left your life behind?

Watching me get smaller in the distance, as if looking back from an airplane window…knowing I was safe…I would continue. Then turning your eyes forward with great anticipation, to see what grand place you were going next.

I looked to the horizon and saw Mt. Rainier — and suddenly it appeared golden to me, like the Great Pyramid. Did you go see the pyramids of Giza, and then dip your hand into the Nile? You always loved rivers. Did you go visit the world’s great rivers?

Jim last took me to Paris, because he wanted to see stars come out of my eyes when I saw Van Gogh, but oh, let me tell you how his sleepy eyes sparkled when he first laid eyes on the Seine!

Today while I was walking the streets of Paris, trying to stay awake to get over jet lag, I made a pilgrimage to the river…but on the way back I got lost, accidentally stumbling across the places where we once walked, ate, talked, and marveled about. It was stilling. In a strange way, it seemed he guided me there.

Tomorrow is for brand new experiences. Just for me. But in a life before, we came to Paris, where I saw a starry night, and Jim finally saw the Seine….right before he touched the Nile.